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Cannabis Campaigners' Guide News Database result:
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UK: Why I'd love to go to jail
Jamie Diffley Evening Chronicle, Newcastle
Tuesday 22 Mar 2005 Up until the start of this year nobody had heard of pensioner Patricia Tabram. But her cannabis cooking skills have made her sought-after property. Jamie Diffley went to meet her. Getting hold of Patricia Tabram was no easy task. Ring her phone and an answering machine kicks in straight away. "This is grandma speaking," it begins before going on to give the number of her agent in London, the same literary agent that looks after legendary drug-dealer Howard Marks. Patricia Tabram is no ordinary grandma. Since she was arrested in January, 66-year-old Patricia has rarely been out of the media spotlight. The grandmother-of-two's bungalow in the quiet Northumberland village of Humshaugh, near Hexham, was raided twice last year by police after they were tipped off about the unusual smells coming from her kitchen. Smells caused by the high-grade cannabis Patricia puts in her food. For more than 18 months Patricia has been making home-made cakes, soups and casseroles with cannabis mixed in. It is, she says, the only effective way to relieve the pain and depression she has suffered for almost 30 years. The news story, exclusively revealed in the Chronicle, caused a storm. Soon other reporters were knocking on her door. Then the story went international. "I had two Italian reporters round last week," says Pat from her modest home. "One was from the biggest magazine in Italy and he took about 300 photographs of me in different parts of the village. He was here for three days and when he went another reporter came round called Fabio." Such is Patricia's fame that Fabio just turned up in Newcastle and started asking around. "He went to a place in Westgate Road that sells all the paraphernalia associated with cannabis and asked if they knew me," she says. "There was a young lad in who shouted out `that's my grandma' and told the reporter where I live. I'm not really his grandma but a lot of people call me that." Her fame is set to widen even further after signing with an agent. Patricia has written her life story and filmmakers make sporadic appearances at her house for a new documentary which will most likely be aired in October. But first is the publication of her Cannabis Cookbook, a collection of her favourite recipes with her special added ingredient. The contract sits on her table as we chat. It is, as yet, unsigned. She is not happy with the finer details, apparently. "I just want to sell the book to let people know how to do it and what measures to use," she insists. "The agents are going on about how I could make millions but I'm not motivated by money. "I'm 66. What would I want with money? I can only wear one pair of shoes at a time and I don't want to leave my home." Despite the intense publicity she has generated, so far her earnings are no more than UKP50. What motivates the former restaurant owner is, she says, her message - that cannabis used for medicinal purposes is far more effective than medicine from the NHS. It is a message she is keen to get across, which is why she is so up for all the publicity she can get. When I knocked on her door I was the 87th reporter to do so. None has ever been turned away. She comes to the door in a her blue dressing gown and gets changed later. She has been up early working on a new website - www.grandma-eats-cannabis.co.uk - which she hopes to have operational by Friday. It will further boost her aims to spread the message worldwide. "I don't smoke cannabis. I just eat it and it's for medical reasons," says an animated Patricia. "When I took medication I had so many side-effects. I was put on Valium in the early days, which just turned me into a zombie." The Government feels the force of her wrath many times during our chat. As do local doctors, the police and the people in the "new stone houses" in the village. Hypocrites, she claims, who frown on her activity and yet are "probably smoking it themselves". Patricia does not eat cannabis to get high. She claims it alleviates the pains in her back and neck from a car accident on the A69. Her depression started in 1975 when she found her 14-year-old son Duncan dead in bed at the Edinburgh restaurant, Zodiac Centre, she owned. "It was a terrible time for me, terrible," Patricia recalls. "I'm a chatterbox usually but I just wasn't interested in anything. "I would sit and stare out of the window all day. But the worst thing was, I couldn't cry. I actually couldn't cry. I only found out years later that it was a medical condition." Patricia's crusade has seen her appear on TV's Richard and Judy -"they were nice people, but I wasn't allowed to speak about the medicines that cause the side-effects. I was disappointed with that". She has been on radio in Germany, Italy, New Zealand and Colombia. But it has also brought the attention of the police. She pleaded guilty to a single charge of possessing cannabis with intent to supply when she appeared before a judge at Newcastle Crown Court in December. Patricia was due to be sentenced earlier this month but the hearing was adjourned until April for psychiatric reports. "They'll probably think I'm a nutcase," is a phrase Patricia says more than once during our meeting. Regardless what they think of her, there is a very real possibility she could go to jail. Not that it matters to her. "I would love to go to jail," she says. "Then I could find out for myself just how nasty things can be for prisoners and see their quality of life and quality of food. After three days my aches and pains will come back and I'll prove to the Health Minister that I was right. "I don't need expensive drugs. I just need cannabis." There then follows another of Patricia's rants, which goes on to include George Bush, the IRA and genetically-modified foods. Patricia, she keeps telling me, is very political. If she did go to jail, however, it would be a massive blow for her campaign. Since being in the spotlight Patricia says she has received thousands of letters of support from elderly people across the country. Most of the village, she says, are in support of her as well (besides the people in the stone houses) and she in turn supports them. The smell of a chocolate cake is overwhelming in her kitchen, where she has made two. One is for a 79-year-old local man whose disability means his hands are painfully clasped together. The special ingredient in the cake helps. Patricia is also registered to run as an MP for the Legalise Cannabis Alliance and has targeted Neath, in South Wales, as a potential constituency. "I'm not bothered about the fame or being well-known," says Patricia. "I'm so busy at the moment but I want to get the message across." Grandma is on to a winner Patricia's agent, Katya Shipster, of David Goodwin Associates, said her client's earnings could provide a nice little wage. Katya said: "We can't disclose the book deal because of confidentiality but something like that should do well over Christmas. "Patricia has finished her life story but we want to take one step at a time. The documentary is still ongoing but has not been commissioned by Channel Four yet. "It is incredibly difficult to say how much money any of our clients will make. You just can't predict how things will go in terms of books sales but Patricia should make a nice wage out of it. "She is very much in demand at the moment." Notorious drug dealer Howard Marks has sold more than half a million copies of his autobiography Mr Nice which was first published in 1996. He is also a regular on the speech circuit. "Howard does his lectures independently from us so I don't know how much he earns ," says Katya. "But Patricia has had similar offers and it is something she is considering. "We think Patricia could be a success in that". -- No virus found in this outgoing message. Checked by AVG Anti-Virus. Version: 7.0.308 / Virus Database: 266.8.3 - Release Date: 25/03/2005
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